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Category Archives for human interest

But I Don’t Know What To Do Or How To Do It!

When I talk to groups of people about being self-employed, it seems the older people in the audience may be a bit more afraid than younger folks about being self-employed.


It isn’t just older folks who can’t find jobs but we older ones have had many more years of being in someone else’s employ and may not have any real idea of what we can do or how we can do it.


Or we think we don’t know what to do or how to do it.

Or we may just be plain old scared!


We need to step out of our comfort zones and change our emotional attachment to jobs! 


Think about it – you are out of a job because your job had NO emotional attachment to you!


I won’t go into a rant about businesses, outsourcing and greed here [I have another blog for that]  but we have learned that if you are an employee, you can be let go at the drop of the proverbial hat. 


We used to think that if we found a good job and worked hard, we would be taken care of for life. We’d have that job til we were 65, then we’d have a pension, continued health care coverage and also Social Security benefits.


This is no longer the case. Jobs have been lost, pensions gobbled up in the Wall Street mess and Social Security stuck in the mud.


If you weigh the scary scenarios – you might begin to think that trying your hand at being self-employed is not as scary as depending on a job or the government.


Yes. It can be scary! But it can also be freeing.



  • making money from what you already know how to do.
  • making money from a hobby you have loved for years
  • getting up each day and seeing your income making activity as  fun
  • letting your creativity having free rein


Then imagine how your emotional self will feel when you earn that first real bit of money!  Your self-esteem will sky rocket!!

You don't know what to do?  Here's a suggestion:

Start right now and make a list of all the things you are good at.


Just let your brain run free and if you get stuck, ask your friends and family what they see you as good and great at doing.


And stay tuned for what to do with your list.

Older and Unemployed? Try Working For YOU!

From everything I hear, there might be a small increase in Social Security for 2012 – BUT – any increase is likely to be offset by an increase in the cost of Medicare. So it seems we will be into year 3 of no actual increase in the monthly income.

The economy is improving slightly but I'll bet older people are not the ones that will be getting hired or getting the "good" jobs.

Older people with experience are seen as requiring higher pay levels.  It's better for the bottom line to hire young people for lower pay.

Then there is the office mentality [shh – it's a well kept secret] of not hiring people smarter or more capable than you because they might "get" your job. 

People who are not seen as threats are safer hires.

In short: The job market isn't going to look too good for older workers for a long while – if ever. And if you rely on Social Security – it's not going to increase.

I therefore put this question out there for you:

If you want to increase your income [and most do] why not be your own boss?

Stop job hunting!

For most, job hunting is a debilitating experience. You apply for many jobs and do not even get a courtesy reply of "sorry." You don't even get an acknowledgement that your resume has been received. In fact, you never hear anything from the places you apply to.

And if you do manage to get a live interview, you may still never hear from them again. Interviews are done for many reasons, and, in my opinion, not all of them ethical reasons.

What can you do to earn money?

  • Become your own boss!
  • Become an entrepreneur!
  • Do what you always wanted to do!
  • Turn your long time dreams into reality!

There is much to say about being self employed or an entrepreneur that I'll post on the topic over the next few weeks.

Stay tuned in


Comments?  Questions?

Wow – You Don’t Look Your Age!

birthday cake with many candles

When people say, "You don't look your age" – or “I’d never have guessed you were that old,” we are supposed to think of it as a complement.

But to me, the developmental psychologist, it means that they have a preconceived idea of what "my age" should look like: a preconceived notion or bias about certain ages; especially “older” ages. We are our ages; therefore we do look our age!

We grow up with many biases about people and other things because having biases is a part of being human. Your biases are based on your family, community and culture.  [I write more about biases in You Can Totally Screw Up As A Mom And Still Raise Great Kids.]

Certain biases are neither good nor bad, but it is important to know your own biases as they affect what you see, do and say. 

And many of our biases center around "ages and stages." 

We often compartmentalize people as being and looking certain ages and stages – and then we often comment on how they are not doing as we expected!

"Stop acting like a child!"
“Act your age!”
“You are too old to be acting like that!”
“You are too young to be acting like that!”

The next time you are tempted to say anything relating to a person's "age," stop and think about what you really mean!

Comments? Thank you

Mother’s Day 2011

Ethel Dorman circa 1932

The Original Mother’s Day Proclamation

I post this poem every year but commentary differs.

We have gotten so far away from the original thoughts of Julia Ward Howe and made Mother's Day into yet another day to promote shopping and buying.

[my mom, circa 1932]

We are encouraged to telephone, send cards, send flowers and buy mom all matter of stuff.

I doubt many Mother's Day shoppers even know how this day came to be or that it started as an anti war poem!

Take time this weekend to reflect about what Julia Ward Howe wrote.

Mother's Day Proclamation – 1870
by Julia Ward Howe

Arise then…women of this day!

Arise, all women who have hearts!

Whether your baptism be of water or of tears!


Say firmly:

"We will not have questions answered by irrelevant agencies,

Our husbands will not come to us, reeking with carnage,

For caresses and applause.

Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn

All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience.

We, the women of one country,

Will be too tender of those of another country

To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs."


From the voice of a devastated Earth a voice goes up with

Our own. It says: "Disarm! Disarm!

The sword of murder is not the balance of justice."

Blood does not wipe our dishonor,

Nor violence indicate possession.

As men have often forsaken the plough and the anvil

At the summons of war,

Let women now leave all that may be left of home

For a great and earnest day of counsel.


Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead.

Let them solemnly take counsel with each other as to the means

Whereby the great human family can live in peace…

Each bearing after his own time the sacred impress, not of Caesar,

But of God –


In the name of womanhood and humanity, I earnestly ask

That a general congress of women without limit of nationality,

May be appointed and held at someplace deemed most convenient

And the earliest period consistent with its objects,

To promote the alliance of the different nationalities,

The amicable settlement of international questions,

The great and general interests of peace.

Let's elect more mothers and end war!

And in the meantime – let's bring the troops HOME!!


An Old Scam With A New Twist

Please beware –  if you know of some newer users online who might not know about the old Nigerian scams which have now graduated from the mail box to the inbox.

In these days of post 9/11 money concerns – the threat of being charged with money laundering may scare some into responding to this scam!

Region No. 2 New York City
P.O. Box 804 Knickerbocker Station
New York City, New York 10002-0804 USA
E-mail: [deleted]

Attn: Sir / Madam

We, office of the international police authority (IPA) hereby write to inform you that we caught a diplomatic lady called Mrs. Vernon Wallace at (John F Kennedy International Airport) here in New York with a consignment box filed with United State Dollars.

Meanwhile, base on our interview to the diplomat she said that the consignment box belongs to you, that she was sent by one Williams I. Luis to deliver the consignment box to your doorstep not knowing that the content of the box is money. The diplomat also said that her first transit in the state was at Cincinnati Northern Kentucky International Airport Ohio.

Now, the diplomat is under detention in the office of (IPA) security, and we cannot release her until we carry out our proper investigation on how this huge amount of money managed to be yours before we will release her with the box.. So, in this regards you are to reassure and prove to us that the money you are about to receive is legal by sending us the Award Ownership Certificate showing that the money is not illegal.

Note, that the Award Ownership Certificate must to be secured from the office of the senate president in Nigeria, because that is the only office that will issue you the original Award Ownership Certificate of this funds, this is because the fund originated from Nigeria.

You are advised to forward immediately the Award Ownership Certificate if you have it with you, but if you did not have it we will urge you to contact back the sender of the diplomat to help you secure the Award Ownership Certificate if at all you did not have it.

Below is the contact information of the person that sent the diplomat:

Name:  Williams I. Luis
Email:  [deleted]

Furthermore, we are giving you only but 3 working business days to forward the requested Award Ownership Certificate. Please note that we shall get back to you after the 3 working business days, that if you didn’t come up with the certificate we shall confiscate the funds into World Bank account then charge you for money laundering, but if you forward the Award Ownership Certificate then we will release diplomat with your consignment box also gives you every back up on the money.

Thanks for your understanding and co-operation

Yours Truly,