grow older better

Tag: Lynn Dorman

  • School Reunions

    grow older better queens college yearbook 1961

    [the yearbook met a few flooded basements in it's 50 years]

    Earlier this year a friend asked me if I would co-chair a law school reunion committee with her as it is our 20th!!  I had not been paying attention to the number of years that rolled by since law school – so I was surprised when she said it was 20!  But traveling to to D.C. in April for that weekend was not a possibility and so I declined. 

    The thought of the law school reunion lead me to think back to other dates and I had a major whoops moment when I discovered it will be 50 years this Spring that I graduated from college.

    As I went to Queens College, a public college in New York City, and  do not remember getting anything from them at other memorable dates I wondered if 50 meant anything special…[we New Yorkers are sort of blasé about things like this and I have never gone to any reunion – college, graduate school or law school.]

    Then I received a letter from Queens College and it seems I am invited to 2 50th anniversary events! Commencement, where we get to march in what I call the parade and homecoming weekend – an event that never happened when I went there.

    The map of the campus was strange.  Gone are the Quonset Hut classroom buildings and the old buildings with Spanish-tiled roofs.  In their places are what seem to be modern facilities – with names – with many called "hall."  When I was there – most buildings were labeled with letters: A,B, C, etc.  We did not have a dining "hall" we had the caf and the little caf.

    It would be fun to return just to see what it looks like…I have not been on that campus since about the mid-1960's.

    I've never been to an alumni reunion but a 50th seems "special." The events are in June and October so I have time to think about this.

     

    Comments? Do you go to alumni reunions? 

     

     

     

     

  • Depression and Pets [a cure?]

    cats in a bath tub

    Some of you know that I lost both of my pets last Fall – one died of old age and the other tragically.  I was a mess and I was depressed….for a long time…

    When I was ready – I adopted two kittens – thinking that two would not make me the source of all fun ;) and yup that was the correct thing to do.

    The female kitten [Sassy black ]was about 3 1/2 months and the male [Smokie gray] about 2 1/2 months when I adopted them in late December.

    After getting over being sick and then getting adjusted to a  new place they have taken over my house! 

    Including the bath tub

    And I am not depressed!!

     

    cross posted from http://graywolfproductions.com

  • 5 Stress Busters

                             Are you stressed?

     

    Or are you among the rare 25% of Americans who are not greatly stressed at least once a week?  [A number down from 45% about 25 years ago.]

    Why we have so many more people feeling stressed these days has been attributed to factors such as job concerns, crime, changing societal and religious practices, etc.

    I am not sure what stresses you, but I do know that the two reasons most people do not sleep well at night are worries about their health and their finances.

    And I also know that lack of adequate sleep is one major cause of stress and that stress is a major cause of health problems.

    A caveat – some stress is good for us – it can be motivating.  This is about that great stress that can be harmful.

    Stress takes one on a cycle of – well – more stress.

    The cycle goes like this:

    • worry about health and money
    • sleep less well
    • get more stressed
    • get stress-related illnesses
    • worry more about health
    • sleep even less well
    • get even more stressed
    • and so on…..

    Here are 5 ways to start reducing your stress:

    1 – you must get adequate sleep

    How?

    • going to bed at the same time every evening
    • not watching TV in bed
    • not having an argument before bedtime
    • not reading murder mysteries at bedtime
    • no late night eating – except maybe a glass of warm milk

    2 – you must exercise

    I know it's harder to exercise when you are stressed. So think of daily small things you can do that make your body move.

    • stairs instead of elevators
    • walking more
    • jumping jacks.
    • hopping or running in place in your house while watching TV or listening to the radio

    3 – you must eat properly

    4 – you have to socialize

    5 – And the hardest for many – you must earn more income

    To read the specifics for stress busters 3, 4 and 5  – please read my article 5 Stress Busters and return here to chat about it and the stress busting methods you use.

     

     

  • Find Your Strongest Life


    Find Your Strongest Life

    Marcus Buckingham 

    This book starts with the premise that women are unhappier than they were 40 years ago and that we need to find our “strongest’ lives and do things differently so that we are not unhappy.

    Marcus cites research findings about women and happiness but to me, the research trained psychologist, I found myself asking what women, what ages?

    I’m sure the woman reader of this book is in her 30’s or 40’s and would not be asking those questions.  Women in this age range who work, are married and have children are more stressed – I know that in my 40’s as a single parent with a young child I lived and breathed stress.

    Why all the stress and apparent dissatisfaction?  Although the gap is not as large as it was, working women still do the bulk of home and childcare – making for really long days.  And we still have an idea of "having it all."

    Marcus offers some useful information about how to be happier and more successful in dealing with the life of work, home and he writes about doing this by seeking and finding your strong moments and accepting what/who you are. 

    He also suggests not trying to be perfect and creating imbalance in your life – two concepts that I totally agree with.  And, in fact, my own recent e-book and articles try to convince new parents, especially moms,  to stop trying to be "perfect."

    There is very helpful information on how to find your strong moments by looking at what is your “life role” and making the most of what is your strength or are your strengths.

    Additionally there are work and marriage-related suggestions for helping women be or feel stronger.

    Overall it is a good feeling book and will be useful to those feeling stressed and wondering what is wrong with them.  There is nothing wrong with you – you may need to re-think what you call happiness and find those areas Marcus calls your “strong moments.”   To aid you, he has a website with his Strong Life Test at:  stronglifetest.com

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

  • I love the sky and what’s in it

    plane and clouds as I approach PDX

     

    When I was a kid I loved lying on the ground watching clouds, planes, birds and stars.  We lived sort of near Idlewild [now JFK]  so planes have been part of my life forever.

     

    Now I live near PDX and watch a very different assortment of planes – colorful jets and Air Force F-15s – but as I am also on water, I see herons, osprey, eagles, etc.

    They all share my sky. 

    No matter how old I get, I will always be a kid watching my sky – it's my way of growing older better.