Tag: son

  • When Kids Move Back Home

    my son and I in Chicago

    For many reasons, largely economic, grown kids are moving back home.

    I’ve not experienced this for myself – but soon I will.

    My son and daughter-in-law have decided to leave Chicago and move to Portland. While this has never been his “home” they will be staying with me for a while.

    I moved to Portland well after my son had left home – and the home he left was not any of the ones he grew up in. So our story is already a bit different than kids returning to their original nests. But – although the nest is different, I am still his mommy and he is still my kid…and it is that relationship that will go through interesting variations.

    He has visited me as an adult, even staying for a few months one summer. But even that was different as that's when he met the woman who is now my daughter-in-law and he spent a lot of time at her place.  And i have been to Chicago and stayed with them.

    But now we will be spending more time together than we have done in 14 years! We will share meals, cooking, household chores and fun times.

    I’ve written about issues that arise at holidays when one goes to a parental house for say thanksgiving and one is again treated as a “child.” But over the years my son and I have racked up hours of phone conversations, or in person conversations, and we have been able to pretty well negotiate that shift from parent-child to two equally stubborn, talkative political minds.

    And now there will be another person in the mix, my son’s wife, adding to the intrigue. She’s stayed with me when she’s come to visit her friends and family but we have never had all of us together for a stretch of time.

    It’s great having a child who knows you write about his life….as he said when referring to You Can Totally Screw Up As A Mom And Still Raise Great Kids “it’s my life but you are part of it too”

    It won’t all happen til Fall and I’ll keep you posted about how we manage.

  • My son got married!

    my "baby" got married        

    This "baby" got married last week!

     

    I often say that I don't believe in coincidences – I believe that all things are related even if they may not seem so to others.

     

    For example – my son got married on January 5th – to his long time g.f. – presided over by a judge at the marriage court in Chicago.  [No one there but them as they will do a ceremony and reception in Oregon this summer]

    That date also marked the 7th anniversary of my buying my house in Portland Oregon!

    My son was with me here when I put in the offer but had gone back to Chicago soon after and I am not sure he knows the closing date. [Everyone in the neighborhood knows as it was the ice storm of 2004.]

    If I had not moved to Portland, he would not have been here to visit me one summer and meet his now-wife…so no coincidence that the dates match – it was already in the "scheme of the universe."

    There are so many more universe schemes at play but those are grist for another mill – or another post…

     

    cross-posted from gray wolf productions