The “New” Empty Nest

Lynn Dorman, Ph.D. // Aging, human interest

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October 1  

empty-nest

Many parents know what an empty nest is……

But did you know it can happen more than once or twice?

 

 

 

The first time you child leaves home, be it for college, the military, or just finding their own place – you can experience empty nest.

 

Your experience overall depends on how many children you have and whether or not some are still home…but one day all the kids are gone – they flew away – and the nest is empty!

 

This experience, I have found, also comes about when a pet dies and you are suddenly petless…but that empty nest, can, in time can be refilled with another pet, or two, or three.

 

You can not refill the nest with more babies, toddlers, teenagers or adults…

 

unless…..

 

Your grown child or children come home to live with you and bring their family with them.

 

Suddenly, your nest is very full!

 

But then….as their life circumstances change – they leave!

 

And that is the "new" empty nest….when your now adults child who has lived with you for a long stretch, flies off again!

 

The economy has made this type of empty nest more prevalent – as more adult children are returning to the nest for varying lengths of time..

 

Your experience overall depends on how many children you have and whether or not some are still home…but one day all the kids are gone – they flew away – and the nest is empty!

 

This experience, I have found, also comes about when a pet dies and you are suddenly petless…but that empty nest, can, in time can be refilled with another pet, or two, or three.

 

You can not refill the nest with more babies, toddlers, teenagers or adults…

 

unless…..

 

Your grown child or children come home to live with you and bring their family with them.

 

Suddenly, your nest is very full!

But then….as their life circumstances change – they leave!

 

And that is the new empty nest….when your now adults child who has lived with you for a long stretch, flies off again!

 

The economy has made this syndrome more prevalent as more adults children are returning to the nest for varying lengths of time..

 

ambivalence-about-kids-leaving-home

But, like most everything in life, each change has its ups and downs….

 

There is an ambivalence about having an empty nest….you miss the kids like mad…but you have more space, time and  energy…because no matter what age your kids are, when they live with you, they take energy..

 

In future posts, I'll write about what I am doing with my bursts of energy – but in the meanwhile…

Do you have thoughts? Comments?

Thank you…..

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About the Author

Native of NYC who moved a lot, got several degrees, and has been a lifelong writer and reader... I am interested in many things - and I write [and teach] about them - especially the human lifespan and healthy aging

Lynn Dorman, Ph.D.

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